Forget.

I think it’s equivalent to an earth-shattering feeling.

It’s like you try so hard to make yourself so perfect but someone, somebody has that ultimate power to blow it up all over your face.

Sometimes it feels like it makes no sense. What exactly am I doing this for?

Being compared is obviously inevitable, but they need to understand that it hurts to be compared.

I don’t think I’ve ever felt this exhausted. My entire self is drained, tired and forgetting what it feels like to carry a proper conversation with my conscience. Because if I had my mind in the right place, I wouldn’t be in this predicament.

I want to have my own piece of mind to scream out loud, just for tonight, that I don’t want to do this anymore.

And tomorrow, I’ll get up and do it all over again.

Chinese New Year.

happy chinese new year chinese 

(:

how 

can 

I 

move 

on 

when 

I'm 

still 

in 

love 

with 

you?

I'm Not Moving.

The Man Who Can't Be Moved

The Script~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FW6F_g3upKA

Going back to the corner where I first saw you,
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag not I'm not gonna move,
Got some words on cardboard got your picture in my hand,
Saying if you see this girl can you tell her where I am,
Some try to hand me money they don't understand,
I'm not... broke I'm just a broken hearted man,
I know it makes no sense, but what else can I do,
How can I move on when I've been in love with you.

Cos if one day you wake up and find that your missing me,
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I can be,
Thinking maybe you'd come back here to the place that we'd meet,
And you'd see me waiting for you on the corner of the street.

So I'm not moving.
I'm not moving.

Maybe I'll get famous as man who can't be moved,
And maybe you won't mean to but you'll see me on the news,
And you'll come running to the corner...
Cos you'll know it's just for you

My Hands.

Accidentally, on purpose
I dropped my watch behind the tire
Threw my alarm clock inside the fireplace
Yeah, and I put the parental control on,
On the news and the weather channel
I'm outside in my robe I'm looking for you, oh

If everything'd stop
I'd listen for your heart
To lead me right to you, yeah
I tried every way I can

But it's harder to hold on
to your hands and the hands of time
I need a hand, girl, I'm trying to hold on
Losing strength in these hands of mine
I need you here
I'm trying to hold on
Standing here, open hands and I
Know I can't do this alone
Hold on, oh hold on
Baby hold on  
Hold on to my hands 
Don't let go

I don't think this is working
Reaching so hard my hands are hurting
Tried to let go in the first place
And I put the phone on the front lawn
Everything that shows time is gone
I'm outside in this cold
Still looking for you

If everything'd stop
I'd listen for your heart
To lead me right to you, yeah
I tried every way I can

But it's harder to hold on
to your hands and the hands of time
I need a hand girl, I'm trying to hold on
Losing strength in these hands of
mine, I need you here
I'm trying to hold on
Standing here open hands and I
Know I can't do this alone
Hold on, oh hold on
Baby hold on
Hold on to my hands
Don't ever let me go

If everything'd stop
I'd listen for your heart
To lead me right to you, yeah
I tried every way I can

But it's harder to hold on
to your hands and the hands of time
I need a hand girl, I'm trying to hold on
Losing strength in these hands of
mine, I need you here
I'm trying to hold on
Standing here open hands and I
Know I can't do this alone
Hold on, hold on
Baby hold on
Can you hold on to my hands
Don't let go
Can you hold on to my hands

David Archuleta~

Moving On.

I was too blind to see it before.

But everythings' so clear to me now.

Now I know the best thing for me to do is move on and forget about you.

It may be the hardest thing to do but.. I just can't do this any longer.

Its NOT, okay.

I'm such a disappointment..

Today's perfect song.

One Last Breath.
Please come now I think I'm falling
I'm holding to all I think is safe
It seems I found the road to nowhere
And I'm trying to escape
I yelled back when I heard thunder
But I'm down to one last breath
And with it let me say
Let me say

Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking
That maybe six feet
Ain't so far down

I'm looking down now that it's over
Reflecting on all of my mistakes
I thought I found the road to somewhere
Somewhere in His grace
I cried out heaven save me
But I'm down to one last breath
And with it let me say
Let me say

Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking
That maybe six feet
Ain't so far down

Sad eyes follow me
But I still believe there's something left for me
So please come stay with me
'Cause I still believe there's something left for you and me
For you and me
For you and me

Hold me now
I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking

dancewithme...

Tagged.

Juma :D

http://calli-gurl.blogspot.com

\m/ 

7 days left.

Mocks.

Exams.

Tests.

Grades.

Results.

Beat.

Die.

Die.

Die.

10 more papers left.

8 subjects.

6 hours of revision.

ah, the pain.

atleast I survived the first week.

Midnight Bottle.

As a kid, I've always wondered how it would be to send

 a message in a bottle out into the ocean.

Always wondered but never dared to actually do it.

Well guess what?

For my new years resolution [ha ha]

which is, to do something NEW every time I go abroad.

This could be my new thing.

It might be FUN to just do it and see what happens 

[although I don't think anything would really happen]

Maybe it wouldn't go anywhere, maybe no one will see it

BUT if someone does, THEN GREAT!

[even if that person happens to not know English -which would be kinda weird]

ANYWAY, yes thats my new years resolution and I'm really excited

even though Im pretty sure people will think I'm crazy

for coming up with an idea like that. ><

And for and as a signature ,

I'm gonna add potpourri into the bottle

 so the person knows its sent with love.

HAHA!

awesome huh? I know! ;)

[dont worry, for those people who find me insane, im not high on anything..yet]

ARGH, cant wait for me to travel somewhere :)

Dunno when that will be but I'm definitely excited.

Midnight bottle take me come with me 

My memories and everything come back to me

Midnight bottle make it real what feels like make believe 

So I can see a little more clearly

Like every single move you make kissing me 

So carefully on the corners of my dreaming eyes

One Cell In the Sea.

Are you awake?

Are you aware?

Of that feeling like you are wearing your heart at your sleeve. Of that feeling like you are willing to disappear but you are inclined to stay there and watch your heart beat.

Its the feeling where you look at that other person and when they look back, you feel a great jolt in the heart. Almost like the arrow of cupid. You watch the other person move, laugh and talk. At that point, your infatuation takes over and you wish it would stop. It would control. You wish your heart would stop beating so fast. You wish your eyes would look away. You wish your emotions would contain themselves before you spill them all over the white marble floors.

You'll feel sick. Like butterflies are fluttering against your tummy. You'll feel not perfect. You'll feel the need to smooth down your hair, correct your posture and smile properly. You'll wish that zit would miraculously disappear. You'll wish you don't gush too much or speak too much.

Its like a rush of emotions. Its nothing but a crush.

I don't know. Its been long since this happened.

Happy Birthday A m i n !

 

(:

Falling Apart.

Hurt is inevitable.

We are well aware of that. We jeopardize our heart on a daily basis with the ridiculous sins we commit and the moment of weakness that leads us on. And the hurt we feel, that excruciating, breathtaking, agonizing, painful hurt we feel, gives us absolutely no reason whatsoever to expose ourselves to the same pain.

Yet, we do it. Over and over again. Even when we know its coming, even when we feel it coming, we do it.

Hurt, when you see it coming, is inevitable.
Hurt, when you are blinded, is heartbreaking.

"And no matter how hard you try, you know it won't work"
"........"
"But don't worry, we'll be there when it happens"
"When what happens?"
"When you get hurt. We'll be there"

I'm falling apart 

I'm barely breathing

With a broken heart

That's still beating

In the pain

There is healing

In Your name

I find meaning

So I'm holding on (I'm still holdin on)

I'm holdin on (I'm still holdin on) 

I'm holdin on

I'm barely holding on to you

Foosies.

We met in high school
Now we will be cool
Forever!!!
We been thru our ups and down
But every time we hit the ground
We got back up
Not giving a WAT
Not what people say?
About our strut
How we walk
With our heads up
And standing tall
It's hard for us to stay strong,
Were we think we belong
But we know
Even with them
We think of each other
You say I’m like your bother
You're like my sister
And that all that matters
And we don't care about all that chatter
But they know not to step to us
Knowing that we won’t ever cuss
We won’t get mad
Cause that aint us
All we do is brush
Them off with the dust
Off our shoulders
Cause aint no one colder
Them us we cool
So cool so clever
With bending the rules
And we will be friends
FOREVER

Copied from Thappi's post.

When you're all alone, 

And you need a light, 

Someone to guide you through the night, 

Just remember that I am here, 

To hold you close and dry your tears. 

Oh-ooh 

And just when you thought you were falling, 

But you know I'll always be right there. 

When you're all alone, 

And you need a friend, 

Someone to help you to the end, 

When you need someone to catch you when you fall, 

I'll be there through it all. 

Oh-oh 

Just when you thought you were losing, 

But you know I'll always be right there. 

I'll be there through the good times, 

And the bad, 

And we'll be there for each other, 

You're the best friend I ever had. 

Oh-oooh 

And just when you thought you were falling, 

But you know I'll always be right there. 

Oh-oooh whenever you need me, 

I'll always be right there. 

I'll always be right there...

♫One. Two. Three. Four.

One Two Three Four
Tell me that you love me more
Sleepless, long nights
That was what my youth was for

Oh teenage hopes are alive at your door
Left you with nothing
But they want some more

Oh, oh, oh
You're changing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
You know who you are

Sweetheart, bitter heart
Now I can't tell you apart
Cozy and cold
Put the horse before the cart

Those teenage hopes
Who have tears in their eyes
Too scared to own up
To one little lie

Oh, oh, oh
You're changing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
You know who you are

One, two, three, four, five, six, nine, or ten
Money can't buy you back the love that you had then (X2)

Oh, oh, oh
You're changing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
You know who you are
Oh, oh, oh
You're changing your heart
Oh, oh, oh
You know who you are....................

Who you are...........
(Whoohoo!)

Fiest~

Faith.

At the end of the day faith is a funny thing.

It turns up when you don't really expect it.

It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed.

The castle, well, it may not be a castle.

And it's not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now.

See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you ,

and once in a while people may even take your breath away..

Breathe.

Welcome to the planet

Welcome to existence

Everyone's here

Everyone's here

Everybody's watching you now

Everybody waits for you now

What happens next

What happens next

Dare You To Move.

Perhaps I shouldn't think about it anymore.

Whats been said, has been done.

Whats been done, is the past.

Resolutions?

None.

Holidays.

Holidays are supposed to be fun filled with excitement and .. bubbliness.

Unfortunately, I got to go out just two times [I had a blast] but my holidays sucked because we have exams 4 days later ): And I think Im gonna fail D:

NOOOO!

Anyway, here are pictures of us hangin out. 

Meet Apple, Edo, Nadya and Tony (:

Hung out with them on the 31st before goin to the 'countdown'

So much fun!

I made the apple for apple (: yay

Cute huh? 

Very Twilightish.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Yay.

Photos below the xxx's are of me hangin out with my plumpiyumpiyumpkin fishy.

On the 27th Friday 2008, Nat and I went to Gurney to watch Twilight..again.

But later, she didn't wanna watch it so we had to watch something else.

Except, the  thing was that the movie we wanted to watch together was either full with available seats only in the first row OR it was 3 hours later [which we didn't wanna wait for] so, we stuck with Beverly hill Chihuahua - THE BEST DOG MOVIE EVER! haha

and it was so much fun!!!

And of course, we camhore-d throughout :D 

Exams Exams Exams.

exams exams exams exams

I HATE EXAMS!

School.

I'd really love to NOT go to school this year.

1. I have my exams.

2. I am gonna fail. [i hope not]

3. I really don't wanna go.

4. I really really don't wanna go.

Plus, PROM'S COMING UP.

On the 30th of January.

I wasn't so looking forward for that before but now I am.

:D Know why? 

Coz I asked my mom to sew this dress for me [with sleeves of course]

So now, I'm really psyched :D Its gonna be blue. 

P.S:
[I’d really really love to NOT upload my yearbook picture :]
So I wont! (:

TheExamFeverMakesMeDoWeirdThings.

I'm not their fan [coz I don't listen to their songs] but I love this picture!

<3

well not just them.

Since my exams are up, I've recently been buying a LOT of magazines and watching lots of movies lately. BAD ADDICTION. I KNOW! And what bad timing D:

Anyway, the JONAS BROTHERS aren't the only ones that have lured me into addiction.

Its dogs. 

Yes, dogs.

Argh what cute awesome furry little creatures they are.

Just look at them-my two favorite celebrity dogs:

Daisy owned by Jessica Simpson

                 

  and

Penny owned by Blake Lively

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaww. Cute huh?

A tribute.

Haha that picture better cheer her up.

Lin, if you're reading [im not sure if u come here anymore but whateverrr :P] this post is for you! <3

Ill miss:

15. Birthdays, Secrets & Surprises

14. Walking around uselessly in Gurney with nothing to do

13. Camwhoring around the Arcade and freaking people out

12. Calling you Yiping

11. Watching Haruki spill all over the floor while eating Subway sandwitches

10. Looking at twilight pictures on the website.

9. Watching youtube football videos with Moritz and You [laughing like hyenas]

8. Hiding from Mr.Weatherly and pretending to do our work

7. Screaming Danny's name and pretending it wasn't us

6. Gossiping and filling deets on who watched what

5. Teasing Yiping about her pevertedness

4. Calling Novak Djokovich -> Novak Dijovack

3. Hyperventilating about Twilight -while havin a convo with Amin whos in the other class

2. Watching retarded movies and reminiscing about them later

1. Telling you things I don't think anyone would understand

BUT most of all, I'm gonna miss YOU, everything about you :) i sound lesbian but I don't care coz I want you to know how much you mean to me and how much you influenced me. 

ARGH I can't even begin to imagine IB or the rest of the year without you.

IMAGINE YIPING!

WHY ARE YOU LEAVING USS?!?!?!

Ping would torture me with all the perverted thoughts, she has no one else to drop it on and with you gone she's gonna kill me with them! D:<>

:) dramatic, sorry.

Don't worry about fitting in there, you're gonna be great. And it's all gonna be okay.

AND YOU HAVE TO VISIT US!

I hate goodbyes so I'm just not gonna say bye. I'll just say "I'll miss you and I'm always here if you need me, just like you were there for me all these days" 

Aaaaah WANLINOH! / YIPING! haha [sorrry that joke never gets old]

I'LL MISS YOU SO EFFIN' MUCH! 

:(

2009.

H

A

P

P

Y 

N

E

W 

Y

E

A

R 

AWESOME PEOPLE :D